For emerging leaders, communication isn’t just about what you say—it’s about what you hear and understand. Listening might seem simple, but in leadership, it’s one of the most powerful tools you have. And yet, how you listen can completely change the way you connect with your team, solve problems, and make decisions.
Two key styles of listening—internal listening and active listening—are both useful but serve different purposes. Knowing when to use each can help you build trust, gather insights, and lead more effectively. Let’s break down what they are, their pros and cons, and how you can master both.
Internal listening happens when you listen through the filter of your own thoughts, feelings, and experiences. You might be listening to someone talk but at the same time thinking about:
How this information relates to you
What it means for your role or responsibilities
How you’ll respond or what advice you’ll give
For example, imagine a team member sharing they’re overwhelmed by a project. If you’re listening internally, you might be thinking about how you’ve been in the same situation before, what you would have done differently, or what this means for project timelines.
Internal listening isn’t inherently bad—it helps you process information in a way that connects to your perspective. But it can sometimes lead to missed opportunities for deeper understanding because the focus shifts from them to you.
Active listening takes the spotlight off you and places it squarely on the other person. It’s about giving your full attention, showing you value their perspective, and ensuring you truly understand what they’re saying before responding.
Key behaviours of active listening include:
Maintaining eye contact
Nodding or using short verbal cues (“I see,” “Go on”)
Paraphrasing or summarising what they’ve said (“So what I’m hearing is…”)
Asking clarifying questions
Using the same example as above, if a team member says they’re overwhelmed, active listening might sound like:
“It sounds like the workload is becoming unmanageable. Can you tell me more about what’s causing the most stress?”
Here, the focus stays on them, their experience, and their needs.
Pros:
Personal Connection – Internal listening allows you to relate someone’s story to your own experience. This can help you empathise and connect on a human level.
Quick Problem-Solving – Because you’re processing through your own lens, you might identify solutions or advice more quickly.
Efficient in Time-Critical Situations – When time is limited, internal listening can help you cut to the chase and make decisions fast.
Cons:
Risk of Misunderstanding – You may interpret information based on assumptions rather than facts.
Less Focus on the Speaker – The other person may feel unheard if you jump too quickly to advice or solutions.
Biases Can Creep In – Your own experiences and emotions can colour your interpretation, sometimes unfairly.
Pros:
Builds Trust and Rapport – People feel valued when they know they’ve been heard without interruption or judgment.
Uncovers Deeper Insights – By asking open-ended questions and summarising, you often discover root causes rather than surface-level issues.
Reduces Conflict – Misunderstandings are less likely because you confirm and clarify before responding.
Cons:
Time-Consuming – Active listening requires patience; it’s not always practical in high-pressure or fast-paced situations.
Emotionally Demanding – Staying fully present can be mentally and emotionally tiring, especially in back-to-back conversations.
Slower Decision-Making – Because you’re focused on understanding first, it may delay action in urgent scenarios.
The best leaders switch between internal and active listening depending on the situation:
Use Active Listening when:
A team member needs support or is sharing concerns
You’re seeking feedback or fresh ideas
Building relationships and trust is the priority
Use Internal Listening when:
Decisions need to be made quickly
You’re in a brainstorming or problem-solving session
The conversation is more about logistics than emotions
The key is balance. Too much internal listening can make you seem dismissive; too much active listening in time-critical moments can slow things down unnecessarily.
Start with Active Listening: Especially in one-on-one conversations, focus on understanding first before offering advice or solutions.
Signal When You’re Switching: If you move from listening to problem-solving, say something like, “I have a few thoughts on how we might tackle this—would you like to hear them?”
Practice Reflection: After conversations, ask yourself: Did I truly understand what they needed? Or did I jump in too quickly with my perspective?
Learn to Read the Room: Sometimes people just want to be heard; other times, they want answers. The more you practice, the easier it becomes to tell the difference.
Listening is one of the simplest yet most powerful leadership skills you can develop. As an emerging leader, mastering both internal and active listening will help you build stronger relationships, make better decisions, and lead with empathy and confidence.